Soul Kitchen

Last week I asked what your God moment was in the past week. Since I sat in the church on my weekend away with my hubby I've been more and more aware of "God moments." I've had many God moments this week that have blown me away and left me breathless and in awe of God. I have had one of the roughest weeks I've ever experienced and many moments where I was crumpled on my floor in complete brokenness.... emotionally and spiritually. I've had many decisions to make this past week in regards to what is best for my family and knew that some of these decisions were going to hurt people. I cried out to God many times this week for His words of truth to resonate in my heart and that I could keep my eyes continually upwards and not off of Jesus.

Each time I agonized over what I needed to do I pulled out some verse cards to refocus my heart and decision on Jesus. Another way I connect with God is through worship. I blasted my new Brian Doerksen CD through the home and worshipped along, pouring my heart out to God. I find it amazing how at a moment when I need it the most that God brings the right words that I need to hear. I had that as my biggest God moment this week. I used to meet weekly with a mentor and I hadn't talked to her in a while. I was on the ground in my son's room in a heap - literally. I couldn't stand. I shook so hard that I couldn't hold a kleenex to my face to wipe my tears. I was collapsed on the ground and had to run to the toilet not knowing if I would throw up from the feelings that were inside of me. I had never in my life been in such a state and I wasn't sure what to do with it. In that moment I asked God if he could speak the words I needed to hear. After I had composed myself I walked to the computer to check my email and there was a verse that my mentor had written to me because the Lord had laid it on her heart for me. At a moment I needed to read this words is when these words came:

Ephesians 3:17-19

"Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long , how high and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God."

God is amazing!

I'm not a perfect Christian. I'm a mother who makes mistakes daily in my parenting decisions. I'm a wife who can say the wrong things. I'm a sister who can say hurtful things by accident. I'm a friend who doesn't always support decisions. I have opinions and feelings. I get hurt and can hurt others in the process. I have a big heart and a heart for Jesus. That's what I know with confidence. I'm passionate about Jesus. One thing I've learned in the past couple years as my relationship with Jesus has grown deeper and deeper, is that God is always there. He does things in His time and His way. Things don't always go how I would like them to but they work for my good because God has bigger and better plans for me. That in itself is awesome. Praise God!