God is always there

I am in a very lonely place in my life. I am surrounded by my husband and children yet because of all the changes in my life I feel so alone and withdrawn from everyone. Where we live I do not yet have a single friend or someone to call on for getting together. I am on the phone quite a bit with friends and family trying to keep myself from falling into a depression that is going to swallow me up. I am on a journey where it seems that it doesn't matter how hard I pray or spend with God, I don't feel His presence or his nearness. I pray and don't feel filled up or nearer to Him. I feel empty. Lost. Lonely. I feel alone with no one who will understand.

It's a very difficult thing to explain that it almost feels like an abandonment. We have moved to a new town where we don't know anyone. For me this has been where I felt all the loneliness. For anyone else it could be even in your own church that you feel alone. At school. At work. Perhaps you can relate to me in that God has brought you to a new place in life where there are many adjustments to make.

Has God left me? Where is He?

"No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."
~ Joshua 1:5-9

The phrase ‘never leave you’ is pretty straightforward, but what does ‘forsake’ mean? I looked it up:

forsake (v.) – abandon: leave someone who needs or counts on you; leave in the lurch;

So if you change out the words, the phrase then becomes ‘never leave you nor abandon you;’

God is always there. We choose to step away from Him! He has not left me! I feel so alone in this season in my life yet what an amazing thing to know that God is always there. I might not feel His nearness but He is my best friend in this time when I have no one humanly here to spend time with. He is who I need to turn to when I feel alone.

What do I need to do when I'm feeling this way? I need to fill my mind with scripture as He says in Joshua 1 and then meditate on it, day and night. What this means is that I need to let God be the one to fill this void. Let God be sufficient for all my needs. I might not "feel" Him near me and filling me up but to continue to trust that He is.