Soul Kitchen

This morning I drove to church and for some reason I knew God was going to do some work on me today. I wasn’t tired. I was feeling quite happy and content and didn’t want this to be a day that God would bring me to tears and break me. I prayed quietly on my way to church and one phrase came to me….”comfort zone.” What was that supposed to mean? My heart was uneasy. I don’t like stepping out of my comfort zone. That usually means change…. “okay God… what do you have in store for me?”

We had an amazing service and I felt totally content worshipping and praising. The message was awesome and I was enjoying sitting by myself soaking in God’s presence. Time came for an altar call asking anyone who has something they need to ask forgiveness for either from God or someone else, to come forward. I’m doing fine… so I thought….

Years ago I had a fallout with some people. Friendships were lost through this incident and it has caused me a lot of pain over the years. Every Sunday I have gone to church seeing someone who was a part of this painful time in my life. I found my own ways of coping and avoiding so no words had to be exchanged and I could go on with my life. It worked for me to stuff things inside and hope that just me and God could work things out between the two of us and that I could be forgiven for my part in things.

God’s been working on me in the past couple years. I’ve struggled many times with hearing his voice and not knowing if it was God or not. There have been many times where I felt I needed to pull this individual aside and ask forgiveness but each time I felt it wasn’t the right time and that God would make it really clear to me when and if I ever need to take this step….. Today it was clear….

….my feet started moving towards the front row where this individual sat…. “front row God?” My head felt like it was still back at my chair but my feet were moving and I couldn’t back out now…. I was on my way…. “God what am I going to say? Why are you making me do this?”

I sat down beside this individual and she looked quite confused as to why I came to her. Immediately God allowed the words I’ve needed to ask to flow from my mouth and reconcile. We prayed together and forgave each other… my shoulders feel so light and I feel so free. I was broken and freed… tears spilled out…. tears of relief and freedom….

“O LORD, truly I am your servant; I am your servant, the son of your maidservant; you have freed me from my chains. ~ Psalm 116:16 (NIV)

“My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear.” ~ Ps 38:4

God has a way of doing things in His time, His way. It was so clear I needed to take that step forward and that this has been a burden on me for some time. When we’re obedient to His call and words, he blesses us. Now I am free from this weight that has bogged me down and I want to dance.

“By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.” ~ Heb 11:8 (NIV)

I felt like Abraham, being called to this place of reconciliation… obediently I went, even though I didn’t know what the response would be when I got there. God is good. His timing is perfect. For me God does these things in my life when I least expect it. Even though it was hard I’m glad He walked me through it.

Who is God asking you to forgive or ask forgiveness of?
Is there something in your life that you need to lay at Jesus’ feet?
What burdens do you need Jesus to carry?
Are you being obedient to God’s voice?