Every Tear

The other day I was listening to the song "The Christmas Shoes" by NewSong, and I just started crying because the story was so touching and sad. Then today, as I was reading in Revelation, God showed me an amazing verse. I had heard it before, but never found it for myself:
"For the Lamb at the centre of the throne will be their shepherd;
He will lead them to springs of living water.
And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes."

- Revelation 7:17

I had been crying because, in the song, a little boy's mother is on the verge of death, and the little boy wants to buy her some nice shoes so she'll look beautiful when she meets Jesus. I felt this aching loss for the little boy and how much hurt he would have once his mom was gone. But this verse reminds me that Heaven is the best place to be. There is no crying, no worry, no stress, no anger... just peace and eternity with our Maker. Life on earth will have troubles and hard times, but we have Heaven to look forward to. It is our final destination, and Jesus is waiting with open arms. I can't wait to one day walk with Him along the streets of Heaven. So let that be an encouragement for you today. Our destination is a heavenly one. Don't forget it.

Ok, so I haven't written on here for...well a really long time. Sorry :S

It's not that I didn't want to write, it was just that I didn't know what to say, and anything that I could have said was too personal or I couldn't believe that someone out there on the big wide web would care about what I had to say. But whatever.

Life hasn't been fun lately. Of myself and my two best friends, there isn't one of us that isn't hurting over something, something we had no control over. For one it was the loss of a loved one, for the other it was abandonment by someone she loved and thought loved her. This world hurts. I know it well.

Through my own personal hurt and struggle this past month and a bit, I've learned a lot. A lot about myself and about God and I've had to trust that God sees the big picture. So when I look at my limited view and I see how much it sucks, I have to remember that God see's the whole puzzle and He knows how we need this piece in order for the whole thing to be complete.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, and this is usually the point when I would read back over what I wrote, sigh and delete it all. I won't this time. I guess I just want to say, that whatever is going on, God knows the big picture. He knows that in order for you to get from point A to point B you've gotta go through some valleys. But, as Rascal Flatts says, "He ain't the leaving kind. He'd never walk away. Even for those who don't believe and want to leave Him behind, He ain't the leaving kind"

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me" Psalm 23:4

Sometimes, life sucks. Sometimes, you can't really see the reason behind what's going on, you can't understand how this is for your good, but God does and, eventually, it all boils down to faith and trust. Do you trust that He knows the plans he has for you? That they are plans to prosper you and not to harm you? Plans to give you a future and a hope? Sometimes that's all you can cling to. That's what I'm clinging to. That and the fact that He loves me. More than I can imagine, more than I deserve.

Lover of my Soul

We've been experiencing some blustery and moderately cold weather here since yesterday. We've had some snow, and the forecast is for more snow.  Snow is fun and beautiful, but I do prefer the warm sunshine. God knows that.

Yesterday morning I was contemplating whether I should go outside for a run before I headed out for the morning,  or if I should jump and dance while listening to some lively worship music in the afternoon when I got back home.  I knew I'd have less time for exercise if I chose the morning option, so I was leaning towards the afternoon option. Then I heard an invitation from the Lord to go for a run now.

I got my runners on and went out the door. It was beautiful outside. The sun was shining and felt warm on my back. My heart just bubbled up inside of me with delight and thankfulness that I was outside experiencing this. I walked and ran and twirled and raised my hands in worship as I made my way down the road. It's a quiet street, so the only ones who may think I'm crazy are the ones who are reading this post. On the way back, the cows were right by the fence with their little calves. Beautiful sight. God knows I love cows.

Then, just as I got back to our driveway, the blanket of dark clouds heading our way, covered the sun. There was only that brief window of warm sunshine, and God had invited me out to enjoy the beauty of the morning with Him. I felt so cherished and loved! He is the ultimate Lover. I'm so glad that I am His and He is mine.

"I am my beloved's, and His desire is for me." Song of Songs 7:10  Amazing thought... amazing fact. The God who made me, wants me and loves me!  May my heart forever respond in love to Him.

Faithful and True

I have a feeling that my little tear jar in heaven has been getting more than it's fair share this week.  I've cried a lot.  I'm still crying and sometimes my face just feels like crying even when I don't have any tears.

I'm not broken.  I'm not depressed.

My heart has sadness in it.  But not despair.  There is a difference.

I have not lost hope.  I have not abandoned my faith.  On the contrary....just saying His precious name in my mind brings a smile to my face.

He is Faithful and True.  He is the Light in the darkness.  He is the deepest Joy of my heart.

I cannot help but think of dear David when I feel this way.  The Psalms are full of his emotion and faith.

I also cannot help but feel homesick for the place I've never seen.  There's a longing in my heart to be with the One who loves me and you more than the life He sacrificed so that we could live.
Not just live....but LIVE...really live.

Be comforted.  Look to the Light.  Look to Jesus.  Rest in his arms.  Breathe in...the life that he offers.  His blood.  His sacrifice.  Our life.  Our gain.  All for love.  All you've been looking for.  Every answer to every question.  Filled with joy in the midst of sadness.  Only Jesus can do that.  Only God.  The Faithful.  The True.  The Living.

And I love Him.

Share the Truth

This past week I got together with a group of friends for a Bible study, and we ended up spending 3 hours sharing and reading scripture and discussing the subject: witnessing and spreading God's love and His story. The girl who lead it really challenged us. She showed us the scene from Titanic where people were dying in the ice cold water, and only 1 out of 20 of the rescue boats came back to help them. She told us, "We as Christians are the ones in the rescue boats. We're saved. Are we going to go back for those who have no rescue?" It really struck me. The people around me - my friends, my teachers, my neighbours - who don't know Jesus are going to hell. That's scary. And yet, I just sit there and don't even think about talking to them about God or sharing my faith.

It's so sad.

We were challenged to ask God to give us five specific people that He wanted us to witness to. Some of the people that God gave me are very scary options. I don't know how they'll react or what they'll think of me once I start to talk to them about God. But I'm praying for the boldness to tell them anyway. And God's already working in amazing ways. I sent a message to one of the people, telling him that I was praying for him. I had no idea if anything rough was going on in his life, but I just wanted to encourage him. I'm not even sure if he's a Christian. But I got a response saying how he was so grateful for my prayers because he's been struggling with his relationship with his dad. And I knew right then and there, that God knows what He's doing. So praise God for the way He works through us to bless others and bring them to Christ. And I encourage you to be bold. Take that step and start a conversation about faith. Be a miracle for someone. And pray all along the way.

In Agreement with my Sister

Yes...Fearless...I agree with you.  And I repeat it again because it is truth.  Worth meditating on anytime but particularly when fears and uncertainties, anxieties and doubts try to cloud our reason and our minds.

May the God of Hope


fill you with ALL joy and peace


AS YOU TRUST IN HIM,


so that

you may OVERFLOW with HOPE


by the power of the Holy Spirit.


Romans 15:13

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace

as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope

by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Romans 15:13

No Make-up Week

At school this week the leadership team put up posters advertising "No Make-up Week" for girls. One of the catch phrases was, "If guys can go without it, so can we!" There were signs saying things like, "You're beautiful" and "Living with joy is a woman's best cosmetic". I thought that was a really neat idea, to help girls feel beautiful without the need to hide their faces under foundation, lipstick, mascara... It reminded me that God made us in His image, and that we don't need to change anything about ourselves. We were made the way we are on purpose... God doesn't make mistakes. Now, I'm not saying makeup is bad... it's nice to put it on and feel extra pretty. I think the key is using make-up to enhance our features, not cover them up. We are beautiful just the way we are. And remember, true beauty comes from the heart and how we live our lives, not from our cosmetics. God thinks we're gorgeous even when we're sick, exhausted, or just rolled out of bed! Just a thought for today :)

Burning questions...

I have just finished teaching a small unit about Flannery O'Connor's short stories to my Advance Placement class. Was she ever an odd duck! One of the things about her, that I think might sum up her personality quite nicely, is that at the tender age of 5, she gained national recognition for teaching her pet chicken to walk backwards!!

Her stories are no less bizarre! They are not for everyone, and many could perhaps be offended by her plot lines and characters. While her stories may not be everyone's "cup of tea", they do offer poignant lessons and are all largely based on the concept of grace and redemption through Christ and our need, as a fallen people, of them both.

O'Connor wrote stories as a response to what she saw as "repugnant" distortions in modern life. However, she realized that she was writing to an audience that saw these distortions as normal or common place. It was her goal to expose the evil that the world had become comfortable with.

I wonder what "distortions" I have become comfortable with. I wonder if there are subtle evils that we have just become tolerant of over time. To offer a "festive" example, among other things, I have wondered what to think about our involvement, as Christians, in Halloween (as of yet, I am still undecided about this and am making no judgement on those who do participate in it). Teaching my O'Connor unit has reminded me of these questions, as they have been burning for some time in my mind.

About six months ago I really began to grapple with what Paul says in Romans about not conforming to this world. The Contacts group that I was part of last year are studying how to live out our faith without compromise. Unfortunately, returning to work this year, meant that I could not be part of this group. It is unfortunate for many reasons, but also because this is the exact topic that I have been trying to work through.

As I type, I realize I have no idea about how I plan on concluding this post. However, leaving it as it is, is indicative of my state of mind. I offer no answers, just my thoughts on a page. Sorry!!

Purpose

My "save now" button just saved all the blank space on my post. Sometimes that is how I feel. It is like I have so much to process... I can't zero in on one thing. And there are other times that I get so focused on one thing that I exclude everything else. I sure am glad that God keeps up with us better than that! How awesome that He is aware of every little detail of our lives and what we need.

Sometimes, we lose sight of the fact that God has a plan and purpose for our lives. We feel defeated, even worthless and of no value to ourselves or anyone else.

Lately, I have been valuing the freedom that I have. I have a niece that was just convicted in September of a crime and was given 23 to 29 years in prison. She was put in solitary confinement for the first 45 days and allowed out of her cell for only 15 minutes a day. She has lead a troubled life beginning from the break up of her parents when she was a child. She was a victim of date rape and has struggled with addictions. For sure, she has made some unwise choices in her life. We visited with her just before her court date and assured her that we were praying for her and loved her. She has four children with the youngest being seven. She has not seen him since he was five years old because she was in jail for two years before her trial. She told us her greatest regret was that she would not be able to see her children until they are adults. She has continually declared her innocence of the crime. We were shocked when she was found guilty and sentenced to such a long sentence.

Over the process of two years we have been writing back and forth and have had the occasion to visit her maybe three times. We write often and send money to help her buy things that she needs. When she does get a job in the prison, she can make one dollar a day. We received a letter from her recently describing the anguish that she felt when the judge handed down her sentence. She had written us the first of the year, excited about receiving Christ as her Lord and Saviour. She said if it had not been for our letters of encouragement in the Lord, she would have given up.

Sometimes we wonder about the purpose God has for us in our lives. How will she fare over the next twenty odd years of her life? Though she will lose the freedom of doing everything that we take for granted... will she find something more valuable? My prayer is that she will, and that she will not lose sight of the fact that God loves her dearly. My prayer is also that godly people will surround her and encourage her.

The Bible tells us that God will fulfill His purpose for us. Maybe you, like myself have been struggling with where you are in life. Maybe you, like me... sometimes feel that you have nothing to offer or give to others. But if you are breathing... God has a purpose for you. There is someone who needs what you have. There is someone that only you can touch and bring encouragement to. There is someone who needs to hear how God reached down and rescued you from a pit of destruction. God needs you!

Psalm 138 has brought encouragement to me in these words...

I will bow down toward your holy temple and will praise your name for your love and your faithfulness...

For You have exalted above all things your name and Your Word. When I called, You answered me; You made me bold and stouthearted.

Though the Lord is on high, He looks upon the lowly, but the proud He knows from afar. Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You preserve my life; You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand You save me.

The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; Your love, O Lord endures forever... do not abandon the works of your hands.

Psalm 138: 2-3, 6-8