No More Mystery

There is something that I see,
In the way you look at me,
There's a smile there's a truth in your eyes.
What an unexpected way,
On this unexpected day,
Could it be, this is where I belong?
It is you I have loved all along.

There's no more mystery,
It is finally clear to me,
You're the home my heart searched for so long.
It is you I have loved all along.

There are times I've ran to hide,
Afraid to show the other side,
Alone in the night without you.
But now I know just who you are,
And I know you hold my heart,
Finally, this is where I belong,
It is you I have loved all along!

No more mystery,
It is finally clear to me,
You're the home my heart searched for so long.
And It is you I have loved all along.

Oh, over and over,
I'm filled with emotion,
Your love, it rushes through my veins.
And I am filled with the sweetest devotion,
As I look into your perfect face.

There's no more mystery,
It is finally clear to me,
You're the home my heart searched for so long.
It is you I have loved,
It is you I have loved,
It is you I have loved all along

Don’t get distracted by the fact that these song lyrics are from the soundtrack from the movie “Shrek”. Get the big, green ogre face out of your head.

Is your heart longing, searching for a home? A place where you know you are loved without strings, for who you are right now? Are you wanting to love with your whole heart an be loved that way back? We all long for that place. It is the human condition. God made us that way, and he knows that about us. Because we are like him. Loving and being loved is God’s idea.

I know where your heart will find the home it’s been searching for.

Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.

It may seem a bit corny, but can you sing those lyrics to Jesus? I can, and do, with great emotion. I hope you can, too.

Rest...

On Sunday evening, I put my back out. How? I sat down!!! Literally. I sat down on my couch and somewhere between standing and planting myself on the couch, there was pain! I was practically immobile. That night I laid in bed, in agony, wondering if I would be better for the morning, or if I should start planning for a substitute at work. The answer might seem simple, but fellow teachers will attest to the fact that it is always easier to go into work sick or in pain than it is to prepare for a TOC (teacher on call). I woke up my poor sleeping husband and asked him to bring me my lesson plan book and my computer and I sat in bed typing up a lesson plan until 2:30am!

All this to say, that hurting my back has been a blessing!! How? Since going back to work as a full time teacher at the beginning of this month, I have been exhausted - border line zombie-like! My baby still feeds anywhere between 4:30 and 5:30am (a habit which I know needs breaking, but am just too tired to attempt to break right now), I get up for work at 6:30, and am home at 3:30 to start my mum duties for the day. The point of this isn't for me to have a pity party, but rather just to point out that I am TIRED! But then, I hurt my back. Ah sweet, sweet back pain! Yesterday and today have been my husband's days off, so I have slept in, taken it easy, taken a nap each day and not cared about work! It has been glorious! I am a bit stubborn when it comes to taking days off, so I think that the Lord gave me this back pain to make me rest! If it were a cold or the flu, I would have trundled off to work. But I couldn't this time - there was no trundling - just laying! I am feeling so rested and rejuvenated and so very grateful for these two days off.

I still have a little pain, but it is manageable now, and I am looking forward to going back to work tomorrow with a lot more sleep under my belt. What a strange blessing, but a blessing nonetheless!

Body Image

Yesterday some friends and I had a get-together, Bible study type thing, and my one friend shared with us about body image. Everyone is affected by the media in one way or another... thinking they're too fat, or should be taller, shorter, curvier, more tan... whatever, it happens. I don't think I know of anyone who can say they've never wished to look a bit differently. But here's the thing: God made us the way we are on purpose. There's this song that I really like called "More Beautiful You" by Jonny Diaz that goes:

You were made to fill a purpose that only you can do,
So there could never be a more beautiful you.


Who even decided what 'beautiful' looks like anyway? God thinks each and every one of us is beautiful. EACH and EVERY one. No matter if you have too many wrinkles, or a long nose, or big thighs, or pale skin... God still looks at you and says, "It is good." We are made in His image, so we are beautiful. And the more we strive to live like Jesus, the more beautiful we become.

So don't forget that the King of the universe thinks you're absolutely gorgeous. And that's all that matters.

Jehovah-Jireh

The Lord sees.  The Lord knows.  The Lord provides.


I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't know that God was my provider.  At my earliest memories, I can see the little girl I used to be asking God for all the things that my heart wanted or needed. I just don't think I truly grasped the depth or the purpose even for which my Lord provides.


The depth of his provision is beyond my wildest dreams...even today.  The purpose of his provision for me is simply Love.


In my every day life...knowing and understanding that Jehovah-Jireh sees everything going on in my life, heart and mind, and that He knows what to do with all of that and that He WILL provide what is best for me is seriously life changing!!


I can totally tell the difference when I walk through the day like I actually believe what I just wrote.


Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.  Proverbs 3:5-6

ACKNOWLEDGE Him.  In EVERYTHING.  And He will DIRECT your path.


I love that!  Yesterday I had to do some shopping for my daughter's birthday.  I want very much to bless her.  I had a budget.  I was starting to feel stressed because she didn't ask for anything...gave us no hints, clues or suggestions...just asked us to surprise her.  She's turning 11 and it feels like she's sort of in that in between stage where she's still a little girl but not playing with toys that much anymore and she's not quite a teenager and doesn't just want clothes and stuff.  It used to be so much easier planning a "Fairy Princess" Birthday!  Anyway...I asked Jesus to go shopping with me.  He sees my daughter.  He knows her heart more than I do.  He is the ultimate party planner (Heaven's gonna be amazing!)  He knows how to provide every need of my heart, even the desire to bless my daughter.


Soooooo.....Jesus and I went shopping...and we found some great things to bless my daughter and all within my budget!  I Love shopping with Him!


You know, God does not always grant my every wish and desire.  He does not always provide in the way that I asked Him to.  But He always provides what is best for me, because He sees me, He knows me, and He seriously loves me.   It is important for me to remember that, when the provision I imagined from Him shows up a little differently.

Sister...go to Jesus as your Jehovah-Jireh...your Provider.  He provides grace and mercy, wisdom, understanding, love, and compassion.  He can provide the needs of your heart.  He can provide rest for a weary soul, forgiveness for a hardened heart, love for the difficult, money to pay a bill and yes...He'll go shopping with you if you ask Him.

If you seek Him, you will find Him.  If you ask Him, He will provide.


And God is able to make all grace abound in you.  So that, in all things, at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.  
2 Corinthians 9:8

Desiring God

I'm reading the book, Desiring God, by John Piper for, well, the second attempt. I've started it before, but never actually finished it (although, based on all the underlines that I keep finding, I got farther than I thought I had). I got to a part last night when John was talking about worship and how it is an end in itself. We don't worship to accomplish anything more, but worship. And then he said, "Happiness in God is the end of all our seeking." Which got me thinking.

Everybody wants things, right? Everybody has desires and aspirations, but do those desires come before, or after God? If our chief end was to glorify God BY enjoying Him forever, would He fulfill all those desires as well?

For example, there's a job opening at the place you work, it's a higher pay grade and comes with more responsibility. You want the job. If, however, you were truly seeking God and you were, to use John Piper's term, a Christian Hedonist, would the desire for the promotion be as strong? Or, would the desire for God outweigh the desire you have for this new job?

I'm not saying that all of a sudden, with this new happiness in God, you don't want things, you don't desire anything, but do those 'worldly' desires sort of become less powerful?

I was struck last night as I read this. There are two things that I want, that I've wanted for a long time and, honestly, can't imagine my life having actually attained them, or not wanting them anymore. But, what if I took all the energy that I put into wanting this two things and directed it towards seeking and desiring God? Would He be able to satisfy even those longings? It's not really a new concept for me, but it did smack me in the face last night.

In the end, generally, we want things that will make us happy. Life is basically a pursuit of happiness. So what if we took that pursuit and focused it all on God? What if we stopped looking at the things of the world and looked only towards the One who can fulfill every desire? Wouldn't happiness be in abundance then?

Peace Be To This House

A number of months ago, after I began my new job and realized that the Lord had given it to me as a new area of influence, (It is a place he has chosen to use me for his purpose and for his glory.) I wanted to speak a blessing over it as I entered the door each time I went in. So I asked God what it was that I should say. Very clearly it came to me to say, “Peace be to this house.” So that is what I say every time I enter. Sometimes that is all I say, sometimes I expand and continue with something like, “In Jesus’ name and for his glory,” or whatever, and then, most often, that’s it, and I get on with my job.

I know that the spiritual world is controlled by words. God spoke and the creation came into being. God’s words do not go out without accomplishing the purpose for which he speaks them. (Isaiah 55:10-11)

"For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven

and do not return there but water the earth,

making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eat so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth;

it shall not return to me empty,

but it shall accomplish that which I purpose,

and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.”

I know that the words I speak are not idle either, so I spoke those words, a blessing, believing that somehow they were accomplishing something.

So, here’s the exciting part. The day before yesterday, I was helping one of our regular customers who had met two friends there. The two friends both ordered a beverage, but the first guy said he didn’t want anything, because he had already had a coffee at another location. I looked at him in mock surprise and said, “What? You frequented another location?” He laughed and said, “Yeah, but this one’s my favorite. It’s so peaceful here. I just like it ‘cause it’s so peaceful.” I just about fell over.

I can hardly wait to see what else will happen. God totally encouraged me through that customer. And if you think about it, that man will probably never know it. How often then, does God use us to be an encouragement to someone and we never know it. But that is getting off the point.

What words of blessing would God have you speak to and over the people in your life? They matter. They will make a difference. They accomplish God’s purpose and succeed in the thing for which they are spoken.

This could be very exciting, don’t you think?

A breath of fresh air...

Yesterday I gave one of my classes an assignment in which they were supposed to draw a visual representation of themselves. The visual was supposed to encapsulate them as individuals. I was a little discouraged about the outcome. As they presented them, one after the other, they mentioned how they drew an i-Pod because they like to listen to music, a basketball because they like basketball, or (as so many of them did) some sort of gaming system because they like to play video games. While there isn't really anything wrong with anything that they mentioned (although I was saddened by the amount of students who thought that video games were the most significant thing about themselves), so many of them drew and explained such superficial things. That was until one young man stood up. A relatively quiet student, he held up his representation and there it was - a beautiful, boldly coloured scene. He began to speak, and as he did, he told us that he drew a cross because he loves Jesus, and that he wants to always remember that He died for us to save us all of our sins. Not only was I encouraged because he really understood the meaning of the assignment, but I was also encouraged that with all the things that we have in this world to distract us (iPods, sports, video games), he stayed focused. With boldness and assurance, this quiet grade 9 student of mine used the cross and its message to represent himself.

In the midst of a discouraging lesson, Jesus shone.

Spiritual Amnesia

I've recently been reading a book called "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan for my devotions every day, which, by the way, is a book I'd highly recommend to anyone. It's talking about how Christians have become "lukewarm" and "halfhearted" in their faith. Francis Chan describes one of our problems as "spiritual amnesia", where we forget how awesome and amazing God is. When we forget who God really is, we forget why we love Him and our love becomes forced.


So, Chan reminds us what God is like: Holy, Eternal, All-Powerful, All-Knowing, Fair and Just. Just look at His creation. It's easy to see that we serve an incredible God. He is the only perfect being, and is so much bigger than us. We are like microscopic specks compared to Him. He never had a beginning, but has always been and always will be. He can do anything and everything, and holds the world in His hands. He knows every single thing about each and every one of us, which is crazy considering how many people are in the world and how insignificant we really are. He is fair and just, punishing sin, but also giving us grace and forgiveness.

Why wouldn't we love Him?

Another thing Chan wrote that really caught my attention went something like this: "We were created FOR GOD... so why do we often act like God was created for us?"

It made me realize that I am so selfish in my faith, and often catch spiritual amnesia and forget the wonders of God. So maybe take some time today to just marvel and stand in awe of our mighty, glorious God. He really is amazing.

Clear Vision

I'm taking my mom to Chilliwack today for cataract surgery. A month ago, she had her right eye operated on, and today she's having her left eye "fixed." It's an amazing process in which they make an incision, suck out the old natural lens, and then slide in a new vision correcting lens. Today she's still wearing her glasses even though she probably sees better without them since her right eye has perfect vision now. She's used to them and is used to seeing herself only with glasses, so she's kept wearing them.

My mom's right eye even looks different. It has deeper, richer colour now, while her left eye still has a grey film dulling her iris. That should all change by noon today when she walks back into the pre and post-op room after surgery. Both of her eyes will then have the corrective lenses as part of her eyes. I'm pretty sure that my mom will not be wanting to wear her glasses at all after the surgery since they will no longer offer her any benefits.

I've been thinking how life can be quite a bit like this. We have our shortcomings, "personality flaws" as some would term them, wounded hearts, hangups and fears. I know that I've had different ways of coping with or compensating for the weaknesses in my life. Metaphorically speaking, I've "worn prescription glasses" of sorts to make up for the deficiencies in my life so I appear normal or healthy.

However,  I've been on a journey for the past 15 years, discovering and experiencing the transforming power of God in my life to change my heart and mind so I can see life clearly - according to His perfect vision.

I have to admit that the process has been scary, and even unpleasant at first, as I've opened up those vulnerable places to God's healing hand. But I've come to love this process and now it's something that I desire with my whole heart, because I love, Love, LOVE experiencing freedom!

As I was sitting with my mom in the eye centre at Chilliwack hospital, I was watching all the patients being prepared for surgery. Each person had a design drawn above their right eye (it was "right eye" morning) indicating that this was the eye that was to be operated on. They were given a little Ativan tablet under their tongue to calm their nerves, and then they had a few rounds of eye drops administered before they left that room to go into the surgical room. Most patients were subdued and looked very apprehensive. I know my mom was really nervous and was even considering cancelling prior to surgery. I was surprised to observe the remarkable transformation that occurred when each person walked back into the room after surgery. It wasn't the protective lens covering their eye and taped to their face that got my attention, but the fact that EVERY person had a big smile on their face.

Joy. This word pretty much sums up how I feel as I come out of those times with God when I (together with a spiritually mature friend) have specifically addressed issues in my life and asked God to show us what is keeping me from experiencing freedom to see things clearly and live life from His perspective. Unlike eye surgery where there are only two operations, I've been through this process many times, each time addressing yet another area in my life that has been in need of truth and God's healing touch. 

I am in the throes of a challenge, issued by myself, to myself.

For those of you who know me and my family, you know a bit about our... eating habits. All of us, excluding my younger sister (I'm the middle of three girls) have gone to see the naturopath (Dr. Ewing) and have had a list given to us of foods that we cannot eat as they stress our bodies out when we digest them or they make us sick. We've also been given supplements to take and the older three have some nasty green sludge to drink to flush out toxins (that'll be me too, coming soon). For the most part we stick to this diet, but you have no idea how hard it is to not eat bread (or anything close to resembling wheat or gluten), dairy, a significant amount of veggies (garlic, onions, peppers *Sigh*), some fruits (the only one I miss is the orange and come Christmas I better be able to have those back!). The other problem is our lists don't all match, so while I may not be able to have garlic, the rest of the family can. You see the issue? We're talking about the Douglas', my dad would put garlic on everything if he could and, most of the time, we would let him.

So you'll forgive me when I say that I have fallen off the Ewing diet lately (ice cream can be to hard to resist sometimes. Also, when you're on vacation, that is an excuse to eat poorly. Seriously, we look forward to vacation mainly for that reason). My next naturopath appointment is on October 5, so starting September 5 I have not eaten anything that I am not allowed to eat (unless I didn't know that onions were in the tuna salad that was made, mom!). I'm also exercising as many days as possible (thus far this week, two, which another go tonight. Woot!)

The challenge is to get me to eat properly and to exercise, the question I have, however, is wether or not, which the healthy eating, exercise, supplement taking etc. I will lose any weight. Honestly, I don't have a lot to lose, but there's always those few pounds, right? If nothing changes, then I can go to the good Dr. and demand an explanation! Or ask really nicely, cuz as I recently found out, I just cannot be all demanding and pushy (that doesn't mean I didn't get a good deal with Telus though. Score!).

Anyways, back on topic. Eating this way is not nearly as much fun as digesting an entire pint of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream while sitting in a friends room watching T.V. on DVD (brilliance, btw), but in the three days that I've been very strict about this, I do feel a lot better and, as we all know, that's why I'm doing this (Ok, so it's partly because of that, partly because I can be competitive when I want to and partly the weight thing... so sue me).

I'll let you know how this goes, and after my appointment with the good doctor, if I remember (no promises) I'll tell you final results. Now though, I am going to go have the same breakfast that I've had everyday for... a long, long time. Two scrambled eggs, a slice of canadian bacon and a banana (admittedly the fruit has changed on occasion, but I always seem to come back to the banana).

Ringing

I found this verse while doing devotions the other day, and I liked it so much that I copied it out onto a sticky note and put it on my dresser. I've decided that I want it to be my goal as far as spreading the Gospel...

"And now the word of the Lord is ringing out from you to people everywhere... for wherever we go we find people telling us about your faith in God."
- 1 Thessalonians 1:8

I don't know about you, but I put a lot of value into what other people think of me. This means that I often am too scared to share my faith with others because I'm afraid they'll make fun of me or think of me differently. I know that's the devil trying to stop me from spreading God's love, but sometimes I give in to his lies. Anyways, this verse was really cool to read because it showed me that it IS possible to have God's word 'ringing' from you, just like the Thessalonians. It makes me think of the song by Casting Crowns, "Until the Whole World Hears":

Ready yourselves
Ready yourselves
Let us shine the light of Jesus in the darkest night
Ready yourselves
Ready yourselves
May the powers of darkness tremble as our praises rise

Until the whole world hears Lord we are calling out
Lifting up Your name for all to hear the sound
Like voices in the wilderness we're crying out
As the day draws near
We'll sing until the whole world hears

I want to have people talking about MY faith in God. But that means I actually have to step up to the plate and put actions to my words. And that's a hard thing to do. I have to ask God every day for the courage to share and talk about Him and His love. It's not easy, but God is strong in our weakness, so I can trust that He'll help me.

Trust in the Lord

If you want favor with both God and man, and a reputation for good judgement and common sense, then trust the Lord completely, don't ever trust yourself.  In everything you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success.

Proverbs 3:5-6 from the Children's Living Bible

An old verse for me in new light.  I've memorized this verse in other translations...seen it and meditated on it for years.

Isn't it amazing that God's Word is Alive and it just never gets old!!!!

This might not be profound for you today but I just get tingly all over when the Lord reminds me of his love through his Word.  Do you know what I'm talking about?

You've got some situation going on or a relationship struggle and you come across some old verse that you've known it seems your whole life, you read it nonchalontly, and all of a sudden the clouds part and this beacon of sunshine seems to shoot down sending new light and new words of encouragement into your mind...

They are the words of God himself...speaking life and light into you...into your world...into your day...at that very moment.  The Holy Spirit reveals to you something new and fresh and you feel like dancing because you are reminded once again that you were chosen, set apart, and beloved by the King.